Why Forgiveness of Yourself and Others Frees You

Forgiveness is a big thing, when we hear of people forgiving someone who has hurt them, we may be amazed that they could do that. What we forget is that it’s detrimental to us to hold on to the hurt, betrayal, anger, resentment etc. caused by the actions of this person/people.  

Many times, that person may have forgotten what they did to you and be merrily leading their life without a second thought for you. Meanwhile you spend your days/months thinking of what they did and saying you’ll never forgive them – so who is the worse off? 

You may say, well hold one, doesn’t forgiveness mean I condone what they did to me? How can I say that’s it’s OK they broke my heart, betrayed my trust, etc?! Forgiveness isn’t about saying what someone did to you is acceptable, it’s more about you letting go of that pain and anger and how it affects you every day. You don’t condone the action, you release and let go of the impact it has on you. 

Another thing we don’t really think about is self-forgiveness which is just as important.  You’ve hurt someone, emotionally or physically, you feel bad but you live with it. Or you made a decision which caused your life to turn upside down – you’ve managed to come out the other end, but you deeply regret that decision.  With hindsight everything is easier but at the time it seemed the right thing to do.  What situations cause you to feel guilt or shame?   

These emotions are very real energy stuck to our energy fields. Carrying the energy of guilt or revenge will only bring you down and not help you mentally or emotionally. They have a negative impact on us at some level.

As with having a shower and physically cleaning our body, we need to clean our energy fields regularly of debilitating feelings and thoughts. See forgiveness as a way of eliminating that negative energy so that your mind and body can be filled with more light. 

You can view forgiveness as saying “yes this happened, but I’m going to release the negative feelings which don’t help me by forgiving you/myself and this situation that happened”. You can visualise a sword cutting through energy cords between you and the person/people/situation involved and breath it out. Send love and compassion to the aspect of you that wants to cling on to the anger, resentment, shame, etc. 

Do a meditation where you see these energies flying away and replaced by the energy and light of peace or whatever feels right to you. Repeat to yourself “I now forgive {person’s name}/myself for….” and see the energy of the situation, the feelings caused dissolving away. Replace that energy with sparkling, silver light, or ask for it to be replaced by Divine love and light. As ever, do what feels right for you. 

It’s like when the sun is out, we feel more joyous, people smile more. See forgiveness in all its forms as letting the sun into your body, mind and energy fields. See it clearing out all negativity, allowing you to heal and spend your life in a more calm and positive way. 

Written by Malti Patel

December 30, 2023

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